This past weekend, I rented The Holiday. I was in the mood for a sappy, girlie movie. The movie hit the spot perfectly. The following thoughts are what came from watching it.
In the movie, two ladies switch houses for the Christmas holiday. Through this, each lady meets a man the other woman knows, one a brother and one a coworker. I'm sure you've already guessed that the women find love. So on and so forth...blah blah blah. It was your basic romantic comedy.
The movie ended, I sat there crying. I wasn't crying because of the movie. I was crying because of me. The movie brought to the surface a struggle I've had recently - loneliness. There is a moment in the movie when each main character realizes they are lonely and their chance at love is right in front of them, but it will take some work. Love has stared me in the face before, but it wasn't meant to be with that person. And ever since the day I walked away from that relationship, I've been lonely. Is that too honest? And since then, I've wondered if love will find its way to me again.
I can't count the number of people that tell me how wonderful of a wife and mother I will be, or that I must have three or four men on a line, just stringing them along. Then there are the ones that tell me how lucky I am to still be single and to not worry about when marriage will happen. They proceed with the lecture of how much better it is to be single and lonely than married and miserable. I know all that! What says if I'm married I have to be miserable?
Some of my childhood friends are in horrible marriages and life has been difficult. Of course I'm grateful for that not to be my situation! But, I still desire to share my life with someone. This post is not meant to stir up sympathy from people, I'm simply sharing what my thoughts have been lately.
Physically, I'm not exactly what men picture in their minds since early adolescence...and I know that. Part of that I can change, some of it I can't. My personality can be hard to live with...I know that, too. I'm making an effort to change.
Anyway, I wanted to post some thoughts while they were fresh on my mind. I recommend the movie, very well written script.
About Me
- Mindy
- Nashville, Tennessee, United States
- I'm a Kentucky girl down to the bone. I live in Nashville now, but KY will always hold a special place in my heart. I'm now 30 years of age. I look back on my twenties as a wonderful time which included a bachelors degree, traveling from coast to coast with Life Action Ministries and college, developing friendships that will last a lifetime and moving to Nashville. Nashville is a great place to live. It is close enough to the parents that I can quickly be with them when needed. I attend church with an amazing group of people.
1 comment:
Girl, I hope I'm not writing the thing you expect to hear, but maybe I am: I understand. Someone once asked me if I ever got lonely being single and living by myself. I said no, because at the time, that was true. In the last year, that hasn't been true. I'm lonely—and I don't say that because I don't have friends and family to share my life with. I do, and I love them all deeply. But I also have this desire to share my life with someone, the day-in, day-out stuff, on a deep level. And I thought by this point in my life I'd have that. These days I spend a lot of time wondering if marriage is even meant for me. . . and what that's going to mean to me, my faith, my attitude down the line. Am I really going to be OK if I don't get what I always wanted? I don't know. The disappointment I feel just thinking about that possibility hurts enough.
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